Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I understand how hurricane paths work

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

Has a cop ever said something to you which was completely unexpected?

I can read

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

Why is our generation so unhappy?

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

Will you share your wife? Can she take both of us at the same time?

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I don’t cotton to rapists

Why do British people always write "xxx" after their names?

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I have a reading level above third grade

How do I get a white man for a serious relationship?

I have complete contempt for fakery

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I know who the president of Turkey really is

What is the reason for the high number of stray dogs in Thailand? What measures are being taken to address this issue?

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

What happens if someone fills up their car at the pump but leaves without paying? How is this situation typically handled?

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

Why do so many guys love anime girls?

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

My boyfriend won’t tell me his past and it hurts me so I broke up with him what do I do?

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I actually pay taxes

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I have the power to talk to aliens through using telepathy. Why do people think I'm crazy?

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

In 2019, We Discovered a Fungus That Metabolizes Gold — Some Already Want to Use These Organisms as the Key to Mining in Space - Indian Defence Review

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I don’t buy bullshit

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

Fighters react to Kamaru Usman's rebound win vs. Joaquin Buckley at UFC on ESPN 69 - MMA Junkie

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I can count

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

When a dog smells another dog’s poo or wee, do they then remember that scent for when they smell it again, or even further know which dog they are smelling if they know the dog?

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I see through liars

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter